How to Stay in Shape and Look Good without Any Extreme Diet

Despite the fact that I was always in shape and never straggled with a weight loss problem in my life, I found that losing extra 5-10 pounds was extremely difficult, especially when you are not 18 anymore. So please, do not believe anyone who says that losing the weight is easy. It is not easy, but I am absolutely convinced that anyone can take off 10 pounds without specific diet or pills. Also weight loss pills could help only to lose the weight but not to maintain it. If you don’t have any backup plan, you will gain your weight back as soon as you stop taking pills.

Staying in shape requires a combination of hard work, discipline and healthy eating.  If you are ready to make it your lifestyle, you will look good, healthy and sexy.
I was so busy with my job during this winter and  it was so cold outside, that all I did after  work- escaped the gym, stayed home, watched TVs and  ate.  When I realized  that I probably need to step on the scale, it was already  too late, I  gained about 10 pounds. To get back in shape, I almost had  to drag myself into the gym five- six times a week  for a month, but in the end it paid off. How I did it?  I  mixed my workouts, 45 minutes running followed by 45 minutes of free weights.

I also donated my big dinner plates and bought smaller ones and as a result, I ate smaller portion and it had dramatic effect on my weight loss. I also started to drink more water and herbal tea between meals. I usually eat only three meals a day and try to avoid produced food. I eat lots of fresh vegetables and fruits, nuts and cheese and tons of yogurts. I make cottage cheese and yogurt myself from sour milk but when I am lazy, I buy organic yogurts from Trader Joes. I eat steamed fish, veggies, rice, and I know a few tasty recipes which are very easy to make at home. If you are interested in my experience, ask me about food recipes and  etc.

Unfortunately, I love bread, sweets, and pastries and can’t give up on it completely. I just try to substitute  it  with  dried fruit and  honey. I also hangover with my girlfriends on a Sunday in the nice pastries place but after that, I try to stay away from curbs for the rest of the week. 

So, how to stay in shape, look good and sexy?  Easy:  stay away from junk food; eat smaller portion; cut the curbs; drink more water; exercise at least 4-5 times a week; run, if you want to lose weight; don’t stay at home on weekends watching TV, go outdoors, it’s a summer time. Enjoy!

Why do men cheat?

I started my active dating life at 17, and I call this part of my life: being stupid.  Because at that time I really believed in love and soulmates and in living happily ever after like in those fairy tales and romantic books. Well, I know by now that they are fairy tales too. Anyway, since I was hot,  my head was dizzy from “ I  love you” almost every week and unfortunately as a being stupid I had no clue that  it needs  to be translated to “ I want you” .

Only later, in my other life, I call it: being crafty, I asked guys about why do men always make up that “ I love you” crap on the first date?. Many said that they really mean it when they say " I love you" . Wow,  I found it amusing and definitely like "one of a kind" answers.

Anyway, I was so obsessed with finding a true love that got myself into engagement and disengagement for  a few times,  into marriage for awhile, and other sweet -romantic  and not quite  so relationship.

In one of such inspirational days, I met someone special.  He was an artist, a guitar player with a deep beautiful voice. He was also a very gentle and carrying person. We were officially in love and  talking about moving in together. I have to say, that was really extremely happy period of my extremely being stupid life. But one day everything changed forever. 

Did you ever have to go on a business trip for a 3 month period? I did.  My boss was sending me abroad and my honey was crashed by that news. On the wings of his misery, he even wrote a song about ‘how a happy man suddenly becomes unhappy when the love of his life leaves him alone ‘.  I just realized recently that suffering is a part of the artist’s inspiration,  the time for creation.  But back then, I was so touched by his emotional breakdown  and straggled with dilemma to go or not to go, and finally decided to go. I convinced myself that it is not a big deal  and we will survive it somehow. How stupid I was…

We agreed that we will phone and email each other every day and when I landed  few emails were waiting in my mailbox. his emails  were sweetest things I ever read. He always had the same finishing line: yours forever. I guess it was just like a signature but I cried like a silly girl over it. That  saying is really true” men love by eyes, women love by ear”. Anyway, he wrote almost every day for  quite 
awhile, first 3 week or so, then less and less and by the end of my business trip there were no emails anymore from my dearest honey.

Of course, I called him many times but couldn’t reach him, except once when he answered the phone. He said that he is extremely sorry but has to run, busy at work. Sound familiar? Anyway, although he said nothing, I instantly knew that something did happen.

I have arrived back home and the first thing he said “we need to talk”, sound familiar? If someone  said it today I would laugh  but back then I wasn’t laughing at all. So, he was extremely nervous and said” I don’t know how it happened, I didn’t want it to happen but I slept with other woman but still love you”.  He explained that his friend was throwing a party and because I wasn’t in the city he went there alone. The girl was one of the guests, she approached him and invited to dance and the rest just happened… Just happened, how do you like it?  We broke up. Later I found out that my honey  got married.  Yep, to  the same girl, just like that …  

And me? His betrayal was so a hellish turmoil that I had to quit my job and move to another city but I learned my lesson. I wasn’t a silly girl anymore…

Sometimes I think about what would happen to us if I didn't go to that trip. We might be  living  a happily ever after life buy now, but.. you never know.     

So, years passed, a lot of things happened, continents changed but people do not change. I still observe unfaithful husbands and boyfriends  everywhere and still confused with the reasons why do men cheat?  

What kills romance?

My girlfriends and I were taking and came to the conclusion that our wedding day was the happiest day of our lives. We truly believed that our breathtaking romance will last forever but after being just married for a couple years some of us lost the way to our happily ever after. So, what happened to that saying ‘love will conquer all’? Doesn’t love live here anymore?

Seriously, let’s be honest. How many of us were not feeling sorry for ourselves and thinking about our marriage as a big mistake? Recently one of my acquaintances whom I met through our mutual friend said that she is so fed up with her husband that the only thing she wants is to live alone with her children. By the way, her husband makes good money, has good temper and he is very supportive to her in every way. But apparently, something happened in this couple’s happily ever after, something left to say.

Maybe our romance is fading away the same way as the color on those old black and white photos. Maybe our married life becomes a boring routine with no place for surprise anymore. Because every single day we do the same things, well maybe in reverse order but still, first and the most important we feed our children then we clean, wash, cook, bake or do other housework. Do not forget, we all have day jobs too. We also have to take the stress at work with our male bosses and back home with our losers husbands.

I have a friend, she is the only one in her family who makes money and pays the bills and her husband doesn’t work. That would be okay, people have sometimes rough time, except it continuous almost for five years. And what do you think she gets in return? Recently her in-laws advised her to take a second job and her husband always accuses her that she is cold and never in the mood, I assume he means sex. Don’t you think that such married life would kill even a good romance?

We, women are also responsible for boosting our man’s ego but God forbid you ever make him feel like a loser because instead of finding a real job he will stick in the depression  stage for the next five years. But I am so surprised that even the losers with no jobs, no money, and no responsibilities still in demand these days. I have seen by own eyes how those men were flirting with other women like roosters over some chickens who is not even close to their wives.

And yes, when the night comes we also have to be seductive and sensuous and hot to fulfill our man's  sexual fantasies because otherwise there is always a good chance that our honey husbands would start looking for it outside of marriages.

Recently my reader has wrote in her comment ‘I became a"mommy" after my kid was born...both to my child and my husband and I don’t like it’.

Here it is the answer to our biggest question about what kills romance. We don’t like to be mommies or babysitters to our husbands. Because being a mother for our children means always giving, protecting, loving your child more than you love yourself and nothing expecting in return but we cannot love our husbands the same way.

We want to be surprised and nourished and  impressed. We want to see husbands who cares  about us and our financial well being, because we are tired of having constant insecurity; and yes, we want prosperity for our kids and ourselves and I cannot see anything wrong with that. But most of all we want our husbands be a man and take responsibility because love will not be able to conquer all if you will not help us keep our romance alive, we cannot do it alone, not for five years!

Amen, sister!

Response to Men and Women Don’t Need One Another.

Few days ago I read an article that inspired me to write this blog. The author tried to convince us that the men and women don’t need one another. Men need women only for sex and women need men only for money. Moreover, men with low sexual drive think about women as worthless. The author manifests that we have already entered or on the corner to ‘ a new society where hypocrisy would be gone and sincerity between men and women would be the rule’; the price in exchange for sex would be negotiated in the meeting places as bars and dancing flours and motels would be place for making love.

Is this is true? Are we really all going to spin-in soon in mating baboons? Seriously, what if people’s values have changed; what if love was valuable yesterday and today’s people only craving for sex and money?

Yes, we, the women are very familiar with our differences with men. Many men do not realize that a woman can’t make automatic emotional lip into his bed when she meets him for the first time. We women like sex too but we don’t want just sex without emotions attached. We want attention and love or you may call it as a relationship. Yes, we love to be in relationship more than we love sex. Money could buy you physical intercourse in which not even small piece of love exists and you will feel it emptiness, have no doubt, with no one there to help you or cheer you up or dream about you. My point is sex begins and ends but we women want to have something that to be continued; which is an emotional connection to another person. And if men are not capable to it then we have a problem. But if you are willing to wait and give us some time to develop that connection you will enjoy sex on other level that is far beyond just the physical.

We, men and women could easily survive on our own without each other but question is are we going to be happy. Do we want to live in society where we throw away not only material things we don’t need but also throw the love in exchange for sex and money? Money bring us happiness. Fine. Why then so many unhappy and lonely among the rich ones?

Do you ever think what if you had to choose only between sex and love or love and money what would you choose?

Even the most skeptical of us, who dated a lot but still single as me, need to have a belief and hope that one day love may still happen because we need to have mining for our whole existence and love would serve just fair enough for it.

So cheer yourself up! Where are not there yet and I hope we will never be in that time where  a society will go in separate direction for men and women.

Because despite our differences we all, men and women want the same things: love and prosperity, healthy children and of course world peace.

The First Date Tips

Let me tell you about the most important characteristics you need to show a girl to make yourself likable on the first date.
Did you know that the answer to the question if your relationship will last or fade is buried right here in the first 10 -15 minutes of your first date. If you did not know that then I have to disappoint you and if you really like someone you better prepare yourself the same way you would prepare for a job interview. The good news is that you can learn how to make yourself likable. In most cases it has nothing to do with your personality or how cool and kind you are. It is all how you look, how you talk and if you have potential to be The Mister One and other silly things. I know sound pathetic but let’s face it that an hour or even two is not enough time to see a real person and like him for who he is but it’s enough time to dislike him. You may ask why. Very simple, maybe she thinks that you are dressed like a clown or you talk to laud or you don’t talk enough or you sweat too much or many other things. It is really important to try not to make a bad impression during the first date. The same way sometimes we like a man for the things that have nothing to do with him. I knew a girl who loved her man just because of his deep, low pitched voice. By the way, did you know that a man’s deep voice could be more attractive than his look? It is true. Another girl said that she liked him right away because he cried during the opera. Another girl said that she agreed date her future husband because he brought his dog on the first date. So she first fell in love with the dog and then obviously later with the owner. Do you think all these women are stupid? I personally don’t think so. We the women judge a man for a potential if he is actually good or not, based on our fantasies and emotions than on reality and his personality. Don’t you, guys do the same?  Men are very visual people.  You like what you see and first what you see is  a woman  sex appeal but she is  much more than that.

And now let me show you what you need to know to make a girl see you as a potential The Mister One. First of all, never believe to anyone who says that he/she is not nervous on the first date. It is simply not true. The first date is always nerve-wracking. I dated a lot, look hot, know how to be likable, however, I was always nervous on the first date. I personally know a few decent men and women who shy in life and have hard time to get a date. Here are some tips that will help you to be likable and to avoid making a bad impression.

#1. When you ask a girl out never make a big deal from it.
Never pronounce the word –date. It is doesn’t matter if you ask her out as a question or just invite her to do something together, just make it sound casual and never make a big deal from it. We all are afraid to be rejected because it can hurt our feelings. If you feel tense or not confident you can  always leave a little room for yourself to back up just in case. For example, instead of “Would you like to go out with me?’ you can say “If I would invite you for dinner you probably would say no? “ Just trust me, it will hurt less since you have already assumed that she probably won’t go out with you or there is also a chance that you will be pleasantly surprised if she will say yes. But you have to remember that she has all rights to say no to you. Don’t get angry or upset, it is normal, sometimes we like someone who doesn’t like us, just let it go.

#2. Dress appropriately and pay attention to your clothes.
It is not because we, the women are too judgmental, simply because a woman usually pays a lot of attention to her own style, and you guys like it about us, let’s be honest , and of course we appreciate a man who cares about his style too. It is really looks ridiculous to see a guy who dressed in a suit and a tie on Sundays 9am. I would recommend never wear a tie unless it is necessary. You need to learn how to match your outfit with events you attend and time of the day. Ask your female friend for advice; I am sure she will be happy to help you.
Three things that are always make a man look more attractive: nice, elegant pair of shoes, an expensive watch and really good wallet.
You can wear jeans and shirts whatever you feel more comfortable. The most important thing about clothes is a fabric. High quality natural fabrics will always make you look better. Pick a good quality fabric when you are buying your shirts. You can find them in “Banana Republic” they look nice and affordable.

#3. Watch your manners.
Newer use your favorite curse word on the first date.
Don’t talk with food in your mouth; it does not make you look attractive. Remember that is your first date, you came here  to impress your girl for the first time and bad eating habits are just not sexy.
Be confident but not dominant or arrogant.
Never be rude with waitresses, bartenders and other people in general because it really could turn your date off. I once dated the person who tried to burst his own self-esteem by lowering others. I was so ashamed and uncomfortable by his remarks and the only thing I wanted was to go home.
Never ever look at other women that just passed by even they are Angelina Jolies’. If you do that she will never consider you for a Mister One.

#4. And now the most important characteristic of the first date is a Conversation!
If you want to impress your date you need to add a quality to your conversation.
Try to have a dialogue instead of monologue. Remember you want to impress your date and not yourself.
Ask questions, listen carefully answers.
Do not give out too much information about yourself. We the women like a mystery man; don’t tell your whole life story on the first date.
Talk about fun things. For example, you can talk about your hobbies and interests, weekends, about movies you like, books you read if there any, what sport you like to watch, what food you like to eat. I personally think that the food topic brings people closer especially cooking together. It’s a lot of fun and it is sexy too.

#5. Who has to pay the bill?
You, the gentlemen will be surprised but who has to pay the bill is not so important question on the first date. If you wish to split the bill, it is okay ; we are not going to make a big deal from it. We, women are able to pay our own meal but if you insist we  will let you be a man and pay it just for your own sake, because guys like taking care of their girls and be in charge, and we girls love that too , have no doubt.

Be creative and Have fun on your first date!

Hot to be alone

I consider myself an expert in relationships because I screw up every single one I had and eventually gave up on love completely but that is a different story. Today I want  to talk about how it is hot to be alone. So I am alone and I am hot. Actually I do believe me being single is the real reason me looking hot.

Seriously, let’s face it. How many married women you know are looking hot? These days a married woman just doesn’t have time to look hot anymore. Women gave up on being hot after she said- I do and it’s not her fault. When I see how my girlfriends trying to go through the day with children, work, husbands and housework, not everyone can afford a housekeeper by the way, I say to myself oh, thanks God that I don’t have all these problems.

Instead I have plenty of time to enjoy my life, of course I work hard but after that I do what I want. I exercise, I eat right, I buy nice clothes, I go to the movies, I go out and etc. When I look at  a married woman I see  her sometimes messy hair, messy dress, no manicure and they are always in a hurry. I ask myself  are we really trying to look hot  just because we want to attract a man? If it is not true, then why we look like a mess after 5-10 years of marriage? What happened to us after  we got married?  Does marriage kill our desire to look hot or we just stop trying? After all we have already won  our  man's heart. Why the hell we have to be hot again, he loves us for who we are and not for how we look. Is that so?

Every Sunday I meet with my married girlfriend, A  for breakfast at the nice French café . She allows herself to have a little time away from her  home and even that she looks at her watch every fifteen minutes or her child or  her husband  calls  because he doesn’t know where the socks are and etc. And my girlfriend after breakfast runs  home like a crazy to cook, to clean, to wash. She is doing 4-5 baskets of laundry every Sunday starting  from 8 am. Can you imagine? Do I really want to have such life? I don’t think so. So why then I still feel envy to her messy, busy and not hot life?